Finances

One aspect of adoption that a lot of people don't go too far into depth about is the overwhelming costs.  Having children, in general, is expensive.  But, when a couple decides to grow their family through adoption, it is unbelievably costly.  We are quite fortunate that my husband's job in the military qualifies us for a couple programs to help defray some of the costs, but it's almost laughable.  My heart goes out to those families who have to pay for the entire cost of adoption on their own.  My rant today focuses mostly on our situation as a military couple trying to adopt.

What frustrates me so much is that the military will pay for almost 100% of the costs of having a biological child.  Which is fantastic!  BUT, and here's the big but, they do not cover any costs for fertility assistance to couples who are having difficulty conceiving and still trying to have biological children.  Sure, it's a good medical program, but they do not cover the "extras" that a good portion of families out there need help with.  Additionally, the military contributes a measly $2,500 per child in reimbursement to active duty personnel AFTER your adoption is FINALIZED.  The additional kicker is that they will only pay up to $3,500 if a family hopes to adopt multiple children.  TOTAL.  That's it!  Even domestic adoptions cost way more than that!  So, if a family is expected to pay upwards of $100,000 towards adopting two children, the military will contribute no more than $3,500 or 3.5% -- outrageous!  Yet the military will pay 100% of all costs for a family who has biological children.... so if you want to have 10 bio kids, then great for you because the military will be happy to fork over 100% of your costs!

The military also has some ridiculous FREE "medical" programs out there right now.  For instance, for active duty women who desire to have breast augmentations, the military has a program for you!  Yes, the military will gladly pay for a boob job for a woman in the military if it is deemed that it is necessary for her "morale" -- are you kidding me?!!!  Yet, if that same woman wanted to adopt children, she's SOL.  Talk about priorities here!  And, yes, there are also tax credits that we can qualify for, but, really....  Tax credits?  Tax credits don't mean much to a waiting child in an orphanage who just needs a loving home and family!  

Granted, we are very fortunate and, in no means, am I trying to bash our government or military.  I am merely venting my frustration at the inequalities that exists in OUR world as a military family.  I am very blessed that our health care insurance and medical will be very supportive of our family and our needs once everything is finalized, but the road to get there is not going to be easy.

Had  I known that this was going to be our path, I would've started saving my pennies and loose change years ago!  Like many adoptive families, we are not millionaires.  We are comfortable, but not wealthy by any means.  Do I wish we had a nice $50,000 - $100,000 to burn?  You betcha!  I am determined.  It just means John and I need to get creative.  I was sitting here the other day brainstorming ideas on how we could raise some money without totally draining ourselves or putting ourselves dangerously in debt and I had flashbacks to my childhood.  I remembered going door-to-door selling candies, cookies, and other random things and also having my extended family members assist me in fundraising!  I think I always did pretty well (though, I think my mom bought a good bunch of the stuff, too!) but I don't think what I raised back in the day would even put a dent in what we need to make this happen.  It's daunting to say the least, but I am determined.